Celebrating Success

Celebrating Success

The brave youth and young adults who choose to participate in our program truly are among the great and noble ones.   It takes a tremendous amount of courage for these young men to admit to a pornography addiction and to ask for help.  They are motivated by a testimony of the gospel and a strong desire to overcome their addiction.  Most experience the ups and downs in their battle to achieve recovery and face strong adversity and temptation to give up and stop trying.  In their efforts to conquer the addiction, they develop character and integrity and in time, develop the skills to achieve a recovery.

We recently celebrated the success of one of our youth achieving the one year mark for recovery.  This was a great day as this young man had struggled with pornography addiction since he was eleven years-old.  His reaching the year mark was an exciting milestone. 

We also recently celebrated another one of our young adults receiving a mission call.  This was a wonderful moment for him as he has worked so diligently to overcome his addiction.  His becoming worthy to serve a mission and receiving a mission call was an inspiration and motivator to other group members who are striving to overcome the addiction. 

These two successes are testaments to the Mending The Armor group pledge:

“In our battle, we form a brotherhood. Together, we strengthen and support each other as we work toward our goal of becoming men of integrity, worthy husbands and righteous fathers.”

Q & A: How is the Mending The Armor program different than the LDS Addiction Recovery meetings?

Mending The Armor is a program that has been specifically designed for LDS youth and young adults who are struggling with pornography addiction.  It is not intended to replace or substitute for the LDS addiction recovery program, but rather to prepare youth and young adults to more fully benefit from meetings and to view addiction recovery meetings as a source of long-term support for sustaining a recovery.  Mending The Armor was created by a group of LDS therapists who spent many years working with teens struggling with addiction issues and saw a need for a program for LDS youth struggling with pornography.

Young people who are dealing with an addiction to pornography need all the support and help possible to overcome the addiction.  The Mending The Armor program provides specific instruction and education to understand the science of pornography addiction, the underlying emotional issues that drive the addiction, managing the shame involved with the addiction and the thinking errors used to maintain the addiction.  The program provides strategies for improving thought and impulse control, relapse prevention and provides a formal way of tracking abstinence efforts.  Completion of the Mending The Armor requires that participates complete each of the twelve chapters in the Breaking Free workbook and achieve 90 days of abstinence. 

The Mending The Armor program is a great introductory path into the importance of using the Twelve Step model and the Atonement for overcoming pornography addiction.  Additionally, the program allows young people to participate in a treatment group with other LDS youth struggling with the same issue.  This can make is easier for youth to participate in group settings as in some cases, youth are not yet comfortable in an LDS addiction recovery meeting.

We whole heartedly endorse The LDS Addiction Recovery Program and encourage all of our youth to attend meetings in conjunction with the Mending The Armor program as well as continued attendance to recovery meetings after having completed Mending The Armor.

Pornography use among teens…..a developmental issue, not simply a moral issue.

​For many years, religious organizations were at the forefront of championing the cause of vilifying pornography and suggesting that its influence was immoral and destructive.  This has led to the erroneous belief among many, that pornography use is a “moral” or a “religious issue’.  While it is clear that pornography can be highly destructive to one’s spirituality and morality, increasing evidence suggests that pornography can be disruptive to child and teen development in a variety of areas.

The paradigm regarding pornography use, particularly its impact on children and teens, needs to shift toward the problem not simply being a moral issue, but rather a developmental issue with potential long-lasting negative consequences.

The following are noted characteristics that have been found in teens who have developed a habit of regularly viewing pornography:

• Viewing and/or masturbating to internet pornography on a daily basis.

Staying up late at night to be alone to view pornography and then having trouble waking up for school.

• Loss of interest in school and extracurricular activities.

• Diminished interest in socialization and outside activity with peers including dating.

• Secrecy with behavior, particularly with technology, and increased isolation including long periods of time alone in their bedroom with the door locked.

• Pattern of lying to parents and other adults about on-line activities including deleting browser history, viruses on computers, etc.

• A diminished empathy toward others and lack of interest in family activities.

• Development of hypersexual attitude, language and possible sexually inappropriate interests.

Each of these characteristics along with a host of other unmentioned characteristics impede the developmental process of youth who become addicted to pornography.  Those youth who become addicted to pornography are typically unable to break free from the addiction on their own.  In many cases, the addiction is kept secret and continues into adulthood and eventually becomes a contributor to depression, marital problems and legal problems.

The good news is that youth who become addicted and get help, are able to break free from the addiction.

Viewing the problem as a developmental issue, rather than simply a moral issue is an important first step.  Educating parents and professionals about the importance of screening for possible addiction comes next. Then, developing and implementing treatment options specific to children and teens who have become addicted becomes the focus.

Q & A: We are not LDS, but I would like to get help for my son who is struggling with a pornography addiction. What is the difference between the STAR Guides program and Mending The Armor program?

STAR Guides and Mending The Armor are nearly identical programs.  Both are specifically designed and created for assisting teens and young adults to break free from pornography addiction and its accompanying behaviors.  They use the same format and share the same treatment philosophy.  They can be used interchangeably.

The only significant difference is that the Mending The Armor incorporates LDS based teachings into the curriculum. For example, In the LDS religion, use of pornography and masturbation requires  youth to repent and confess these actions to their bishop.   Youth who complete the Mending The Armor program are given counsel and guidance to visit with their bishops and follow the church’s guidelines for repentance.  Young men in the LDS church who are preparing to serve missions need to eliminate the habit of masturbation in addition to abstaining from pornography use.  Successful completion of the Mending The Armor program requires youth to achieve abstinence from masturbation in addition to pornography.  In contrast, The STAR Guides program recommends that youth carefully consider the ramifications of a masturbation habit and decide on an individual case by case basis the appropriateness of masturbation rather than making it a program requirement.

It is common for LDS youth and non LDS youth to participate in group treatment together with the only difference being that the LDS youth would be completing the Mending The Armor curriculum and non-LDS youth would be completing the STAR Guides curriculum.

Missionaries, Mending The Armor and LDS Addiction Recovery

​Many of the clients who have participated in the Mending The Armorprogram have been young men preparing for missions or returned missionaries who have slipped back into the addiction.  As therapists working with LDS young men, we recognize the problem is real and that unfortunately, even returned missionaries sometimes need treatment for pornography addiction.

Dr. Don Hilton stated in his book He Restoreth My Soul wrote: “The current scenario of sending the young man on a mission after three to six months of “white knuckle’ sobriety is only setting him up for intermittent struggling throughout his mission, and/or quick relapse upon return and re-introduction into the overwhelming media barrage he will sure face”.

Speaking of returned missionaries he wrote: “Understand that the majority of young men returning from missions are slipping quickly into addiction, and we must be ready to support them with 12 Step support groups specific to pornography addiction immediately upon return from their mission.  We should be as determined to support them as the adversary is to capture them as they emerge from a spiritual high and enter the world again.  If we can change the current pattern of quick relapse after mission, we can begin to see dating and marriage patterns return to normalcy”.

Treatment specific to pornography addiction among LDS young men is greatly needed.  Mending The Armor is designed to meet this need.

Using the YPAST (Youth Pornography Addiction Screening Tool) our outcome studies have shown that participants who have completed this program, participated in LDS addiction recovery meetings and worked closely with their bishops have experienced high rates of success in abstaining and managing pornography addiction and other unwanted sexual behaviors.  The average pre-treatment YPAST score is a 57.  The post-treatment YPAST score is a 19.  These findings suggest significant improvement in reducing and eliminating pornography use among our clients.

It is important to note that the Mending The Armor program is not intended to replace the LDS Addiction Recovery Program, but rather to prepare youth and young adults to more fully benefit from recovery meetings.  Participants are encouraged to participate in LDS twelve-step Recovery meetings in conjunction with the Mending The Armor program.  Clients are prepared to transition from our treatment services into their local LDS Addiction Recovery Programs for long-term support and recovery.

The “Slippery Slope”—Helping LDS Youth in Treatment Avoid Relapse into Porn

Compulsive Use of pornography with or without masturbation often leads to pushing boundaries and morality violations including sexting, misuse of social networks and improper on-line conduct.

In  young adulthood the continued use of compulsive pornography can eventually lead to anonymous sex (met online, in sex clubs etc.), frequenting adult bookstores and strip clubs, prostitutes and massage parlors, multiple affairs, GPS smartphone hook-ups and a multitude of other dangerous sexual behaviors.

For those struggling with pornography addiction, the concept of the “slippery slope” is a familiar one.  Some refer to it as “the bubble” or “the trance”.  These terms refer to the mindset and physical symptoms that accompany the fixation and drive for a sexual experience.   In this trance like state fixated on sexual arousal, the physical symptoms include Increased heart rate, dilated pupils, shallow breathing, sweating,  a “rush” or “euphoric” feeling and the most destructive a Reduced Capacity for Intellectual Functioning.

Once a young person finds themselves in this condition it becomes very difficult to not act out sexually in one form or another.  Teens and young adults involved in treatment for pornography addiction learn to recognize when they are entering the “slippery slope” or “the bubble”.  As part of their recovery plan, they formulate a strategy for avoiding this state by reaching out to others.  Often, those they connect with are members of their treatment groups who are at a more advanced stage of recovery from pornography addiction.

When a young person recognizes the signs of the “slippery slope” they train themselves to immediately text or call a support person.  This act of reaching out to others disrupts the pattern and allows the young person to share thoughts and feelings with another person rather than remaining on the slippery slope and dealing with emotional discomfort through acting out sexually.

Group therapy for teens and young adults is an important part of the treatment process because it creates a support system.  It allows young people to support and strengthen one another in their efforts to overcome the addiction.